Celebrity stylist turned fashion designer Rachel Zoe is married to Rodger Berman and the couple has a newish baby together. However, Rachel has had a longtime side piece and his name is literally Literally. Rodger is completely aware of the ongoing affair and while he doesn't love the arrangement, he understands their love and accepts it.

Rachel and Literally have been living together and literally attached at the lip since literally at least 2009. At least. The couple is not shy about flaunting their passion for each other (as witnessed in the video below) and their firey love affair doesn't look to be ending any time soon.

There is at least one pretty significant aspect of Literally that Rachel doesn't seem to understand on a basic core level. But they've somehow worked around that. Literally lets it slide and Rachel just doesn't give a fuck. Literally.

I love these two and I really hope this newish baby doesn't get in the way of their flourishing love.

Posted by Havilah

Comedienne Sarah Silverman and her loooooonnngtime lover, Abortion, are still gazing into each other's eyes with a burning desire even after all these years. Sarah tweeted this photo of herself before and after abortion ("in case R[owe] v W[ade] gets overturned") the other night and I'm loving that afterglow she is owning in the after photo. Sarah and Abortion have been in a committed relationship (as of now the fucking communist government won't let them get married) since at least 2007.

The couple came close to calling it quits when Sarah was influenced by her girlfriends who thought the relationship was unhealthy. Thank god they worked that shit out. I mean, thank. God.

We haven't heard a lot from the couple in the past few years, but after this latest tweet, I'm confident their love will live on forever.

Posted by Havilah

Sweet Brown and Cold Pop have been lovers since forever, Readers. It's the tale as old as time, really. Cold Pop is always there for Sweet Brown and Sweet will stop at nothing to prove her love to Pop. In the now famous clip below we see Sweet telling just one of many stories of her unending and life-affirming love for Cold Pop. Sweet won't let sleep, fire, bronchitis or the threat of death by raging inferno stand between her and her Pop. This is the kind of love I'm looking for, Readers. The real thing.

UPDATE: Here we have Sweet Brown taking the world on a tour of Cold Pop's house. They really are Sweet together. She likes it, it likes her.

Posted by Havilah

Kate Winslet has been open about her love for The T (the truth, baby, the truth) ever since she had a public fucking fit over her ridiculously photoshopped GQ cover where here legs were made to look nearly a third smaller than they do in the original photo. Kate has recently been hitting the red carpet to promote the release of Titanic 3D and the doll has taken her fucking T with her! Last week she and The T made love on set at MTV where she had this to say about Celine Dion's masterpiece, "My Heart Will Go On", "I wish I could say, 'Oh listen, everybody! It's the Celine Dion song!' But I don't, I just have to sit there, you know, kind of straight-faced with a massive internal eye roll. [It makes me] feel like throwing up." Fucking. Brilliant.This bitch and and this bitch (pointing at myself) need to BFF with each other, because we are soul mates to the maximum level, I feel.

Just the other day Kate took The T with her to an interview with Daily Mail and had this to say about her costar, Leonardo DiCaprio, "We do look very different, we’re older. Leo’s 37, I’m 36 – we were 21 and 22 when we made that film. You know, he’s fatter now – I’m thinner. It’s true though!" It is true, though. And why are she and I not hanging out having T right now?!?!

I love you, girl. You and The T.

Posted by Havilah

Today's Daily Duo, OctoMom and Ew, is hard to look at, most of us wish we didn't know them at all and they're kind of in an unhealthy relationship in some ways (Ew can be very controlling), but that doesn't mean we shouldn't still salute them for sticking it out with each other out of love and a mutual respect for grossness.

The pair recently took their love to the public arena once again in the form of this not-really-nude photo for Closer Magazine (who gave them $10K for it). That's sweet. But honestly, this display is way less "Ew"-inducing than when OctoMom and Ew first came out to the world with their love. But I shouldn't belittle what they have going on now. Relationships can't always maintain that initial "wow" factor, you know? Not that they fizzle out, they just become something new and sometimes it's maybe a little more tame or mature than what they once were.

Ew.


Posted by Havilah

Suri Cruise has been playing "The Floor Is Lava" since birth (possibly even in utero). Suri is now 5 years old (going on 80) and her love for the floor being lava and her equal and opposite hatred of said lava on the floor is still going strong and I see no end in sight for this flourishing love affair.

Suri started her very own blog/burn book last year and The Floor Is Lava is hugely supportive of it, since she gets to write it either sitting on a chair (with both feet tucked under her, natch) or from high atop her preferred throne (Katie) using her iPhone 7.

It is now perfectly clear to all of us who love (or once loved) The Floor Is Lava that our love is nothing (nothing) compared to Suri's.

We salute today's Daily Duo (from way down here).

Posted by Havilah

Royce Reed and Marilyn Hoggatt are today's (and every day's, really) Daily Duo. These two are besties who live in an old hotel on downtown LA's Skid Row. These two are sort of a Yin and Yang situation, except...not. Marilyn is a delicious little (big) morsel who's pretty positive about shit, considering she lives in a "shit hole". Royce is a fucking bitch on wheels (in a good/scary way). Royce knows eleganza and even RuPaul wouldn't stand a chance if they went peep-toe to peep-toe in an Elegance-Off. Royce says shit like, "God on a wheel!" and means it, making her one of my favorite people, officially. She also hates pretty much everything, so we're kind of like soul mates. But alas, Royce has already found her soulmate and she is Marilyn (no one's sure why, including both of them). I love these bitches. Long live The Daily Duo!!

Posted by Havilah

These two have been a couple (in my mind) since this morning when I read about them allegedly spending the night together (in a sexy way). I feel this rumor needs to be true and it needs to move to the next level of being a fact (meaning they should be photographed in an airport together with scarves over their faces). A of all, I did not know The Depp hung out in my city, I need to start my starvation diet and stop washing hair (it's like always wearing clean panties in case of a wreck, you just never know). B of all, the idea of these two bumping pretties just feels really right, to me. In a "so wrong it's right" kind of way. I need this to be real, Readers. Just imagine the merry mixups that could ensue when Mary Kate and Ashley try to fool Johnny so that Ashley can go to the grand opening of a new Hot Topic during Johnny's big red carpet premiere. It's like parent trap but for lovas. Lova' Trap. T-fucking-M. The potential for foolery is endless. I need it!

Posted by Havilah

Congratulations to Alicia and Christina. Mostly for being today’s Daily Duo but also for getting engaged. Here’s why I think this proposal is special: because it’s probably one of the most predictable, yawn-worthy, uncreative proposals Canada has ever seen and yet somehow I was totally choked up watching it and I had to take off my awesome indoor scarf because my heart had gotten all warmed up over this shit. Alicia and Christina have been together for a certain amount of time and they probably have no children (I was wrong once and I could be wrong again). Theirs is also a story of warring factions coming together for love (it’s very John Smith and Pocahontas) because Alicia is a Maple Leafs fan and Christina is an Ottawa Senators fan. Ne’er the twain have met until this sacred day upon the ice and for nothing more than love. True, lesbian love. We salute you, Christina and Alicia.

Posted by Havilah

Today’s Daily Duo are my Sims, Havilah Awesome (it's a less unusual name than you probably think) and Donna Tutch. They are a lesbian couple who have been partners since the beginning of time (for them) and they recently moved in together (after an extensive app update). Here’s what, Readers: there’s no gay marriage in Simtown. Yeah, that’s right. And they can’t even adopt a fucking baby, Readers! I tried! Here’s what Sims Freeplay for iPad had to say when I tried to give them the love-baby they so desperately want, “Babies need a family to care for them! A married couple needs to live here to have a baby.” So since my two ladies are not allowed to get married because they’re gay, then the fucking government of Simtown (who Havilah Awesome fucking works for by the way) is basically saying that gays not only can’t get married but they can’t ever be a proper family and therefore will never be allowed to adopt a child. The fucking injustice here is fucking unjust. I want to start an Occupy Simtown Gayhaterville Movement in my Simtown. But guess what! They won’t fucking let me do that either! And even if I did they’d probably pepper spray me in the face and then steal my tent and hot plate the minute I turned my back to watch a performance art piece about why my vagina will one day eat the government and reign supreme.

And that's why they're today's Daily Duo.
Because life is not fucking easy for them!
And I salute them.

I need a fucking Vicodin.

Posted by Havilah